If you’re up for watching a lot of bad baseball, the Houston Astros have an opening for a PR position. Here’s are highlights from the ad.

It begins:

The Houston Astros are looking for a hard-working, (You can’t be stopped) high energy, (No energy drinks needed) team-oriented (How does this impact US?) individual with strong communications experience and skills to join our MEDIA RELATIONS team.

Have you watched the Astros, baseball’s worst team? Keep those energy drinks handy to stay awake.

While the person who serves in this role may be involved with travel to Spring Training and on selected regular season road trips, the primary focus will be to support our business communications and PR.  S/he must have STRONG relationship skills as you will need to develop and maintain strong relationships with players, media, and baseball operations personnel. 

However, considering the disaster, don’t get too close to players and baseball operations personnel since most of them likely won’t be around for long.

And finally:

In order to be considered you must be a personable individual (When we call, will people say they actually like working with you?) with an upbeat demeanor (How do you handle the tough days?) and able to handle the sometimes hectic and intense demands (How do you juggle 15 requests which are all #1 priorities to someone else?) of the position while maintaining a positive, professional attitude at all times.

Last but not least, we are looking for a true team player.  You must be able to show, by way of past work related examples and experiences, your ability to work exceptionally well with everyone!

Especially with everyone being so cranky following loss after loss after loss!

Also, applicant must know what league Houston will play in next year. There will be a test.